Choosing Not to Forgive
Consider how foundational forgiveness is to one’s relationship with God. Doesn’t this relationship begin with one’s confession of sin and God’s forgiveness of it (1 John 1:9)? And if a person is to receive God’s forgiveness, doesn’t it require them to forgive others?

Consider these passages:
► Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 6:14-15)
► Parable of the Unforgiving Servant (Matthew 18:21-35)
► The Lord’s Prayer (Luke 11:4)
► Forgiveness is a Command (Colossians 3:13)

Consider how many Christians have chosen not to forgive. From our experience, we believe there are possibly 80 percent or more of the people in a given congregation that harbor unforgiveness toward others. Could this be a major barrier to revival?

Unforgiveness Given a Pass
What is so special about unforgiveness that we assume it is any less of a sin than other sins? Is it because of the pain or trauma one may have experienced at the hands of others, and wanting to be sympathetic, we fail to speak candidly with the person about the seriousness of that sin?

Consider the sins of adultery, murder, rape, and theft. We expect the person committing those sins to immediately stop. Yet with the sin of unforgiveness, its lingering presence is often excused.

Forgiveness Is a Decision
Consider the worldview behind the phrase, “Forgiveness is a process.” Is there biblical merit for that phrase? Is there a single verse or passage in the Bible that justifies or tolerates one who is “trying to forgive” over weeks, months, and maybe even years?

Can it be understood that this is a human-centered approach to forgiveness? Doesn’t this sentiment employ human reasoning that allows the sin to linger, instead of making an immediate decision to forgive and be free from the offender?

If adultery is a sin and must immediately be confessed and stopped, why is it that some have tried to place the sin of unforgiveness in a class by itself, giving it approval to be continued over time? There isn’t anyone who would say murder isn’t a sin, but would we allow a murderer to gradually cut back on the people they murder over time, and condone their murders until they wean themselves off that act?

That is the same rationale that has been used by many toward the sin of unforgiveness. We ask again, is there biblical merit for the concept of a gradual process which condones the sin of unforgiveness over a prolonged period of time?

Forgiveness is a decision we make and we stand on, and a decision we fight to maintain. Unforgiveness is no different than any other sinful tendency that attempts to linger in the life of a Christian.

Mental Health and Forgiveness
Close to 50 percent of the people who come to us for freedom from addictions or mental torment walk away. When they find out that they must forgive to be free, they choose rather to cope with anti-depressant medications or therapy, or they self-medicate themselves with alcohol or some other escape mechanism in an attempt to numb the pain from an offense. An immediate decision to forgive, and standing on that decision, often brings instantaneous healing and release from the pain. We have seen this time and again.

Congregations Harboring Unforgiveness
Consider the number of congregations that have experienced church splits. Consider the people within a congregation that harbor ill feelings toward different parties within that congregation. How could a church like this believe God would honor their prayers for revival?

Church Leaders Are Culpable
Has it been noticed that whenever a church experiences divisiveness, or a split, that it always originates among those with influence–the leaders?

Consider the formation of new denominations, or fellowships of churches, parachurch organizations, and independent churches. If the history in the formation of these organizations was to be studied, would there be clear evidence of extreme divisiveness?

Consider also the founders of these organizations, as well as the leaders of the organization that was broken off from. If their behavior, words, and actions were to be examined when they broke off from the previous organization, would there be clear evidence that there was bitter hostility and animosity between the two?

Video
We encourage the reader to watch this six-minute video which shows how unforgiveness can affect a person.

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